replaying the same brokenness
and you confirmed it is not okay for me to fall apart
but at the same time,
It's all the instability in my life no?
but I learned faith and I learned back up
and I learned how much you are on your own in America
how you have to keep to yourself
I am vulnerable
Always have been, born into this
Andre wants me back
but he always does
wants to have access again after I cut him off
and Lord, how I fought calling you last night, Angel
but its all portraits of the past
its all part of me
parts of my life
Oh how I wish I could look back and have something to show for it
How I asked God for all this?
Wanted to experience love, but all I got was broken heart
not fair, yes there were great times. So why I focus on the end?
I always did. Andre was an artist, and Angel was a nurturer of some sorts.
He made me feel like it was okay to be me (in the beginning). I liked his desire for me.
Andre honestly believes I am the most beautiful woman in the world, that was shocking.
There were both enamored by me. Oh how I hate new Brunswick. Andre says I shouldn't use the word hate.
But what to use? the worst time, after the best time of healing with God.
Would I be the same person if I didn't go through New Brunswick? Not.
Create a vision for yourself, Auris. The future you want to create.
Stop giving energy to all this past. The past we cannot change, only the future.
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